Oh why were you born so beautiful.....?

Crap! Bloody and utter crap!

20 people died when an express bus dived into a ravine, the bus having no permit to ply the relevant route, being 20 years old, the driver having 13 traffic summonses and 2 warrant of arrest, the aged chassis was evident when the roof was wholly severed from the main chassis and what did our government do? The PM was quoted as saying something to this effect, " I am sorry to hear about the loss of lives and I hope something would be done to ensure that this will not happen again!" You are sorry Pak Lah? And you hope something will be done to ensure that it will not happen again? Excuse me! Haven't I heard that before? That's it? Nobody is fired? First of all, how about firing the Minister of Transport? Or at the bloody least, fuck him in public? Reprimand him for a job NOT fucking done! How many times have this happened? Tell me please. Because I have lost count. Drunken driver. Sleepy driver. Stoned driver. Old vehicle. Buses in bad shape. No permit.

Every time it happens, the authorities will come up with steps to improve things. Like "drivers will be asked to take refresher courses". And there must be 2 drivers. And one driver can only drive for not more than 8 hours. Now they want to make CEO of transport companies personally liable and guilty of an offence too. And suddenly, there must be some compliance with some European standard! Haven't we all fucking heard it before?

And what the blinking fuck was the police doing? And RIMV too? Busy catching people with tinted windows huh? 13 traffic summonses and 2 warrant of arrest and the driver was happily driving a bus loaded with university students, kids, pregnant women and what have you? Busy raiding houses of blog owners are we?

Dear Mr Prime Minister. Please la. Don't la you go around saying sorry and hope that things will be done to ensure that it will not happen again. Because IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN JUST AS THE FUCKING SUN RISES EVERY MORNING!!! Please la do something happening Mr Pak Lah. Read my lips...H.A.P.P.E.N.I.N.G. And by that I don't mean you should establish a 80 member committee to look into the problems or some shit like that. Because that is oh so 30 minutes ago my man.

When I was a freshie in the university, and when we lost a football match to another college, the seniors would line up the whole college to greet us with a song. It goes like this...

Oh why were you born so beautiful
Oh why were you born at all
You ain't of no use
You ain't of no use at all
Go back you fool
Go back you fool
Go back you bloody fools!

Uh, erm...take a wild guess why I suddenly remember that song...

Road Mosquitoes

Ordinarily, if I were in a civilized society where law, order and efficient and sensible enforcement of it prevailed, I would approve of motorcycles. In fact, I would postiveily encourage them. But not in Malaysia. Not here. I love motorcycles, but I generally hate the motorcyclists here. To me they are road mosquitoes - singularly or in small groups an annoyance but a complete menace in droves.

Like mosquitoes they roam here and there without a care for those lines so carefully painted on the road nor those strange looking words and symbols posted on metal boards or poles by the side of the road. They playfully weave in and out of traffic, ride closely together sometimes one foot on the other's motorcyle, take corners like they were in a close neck and neck finish of a 500cc Superbike race, hog whole lanes if not two lanes (yes they are small but they are able to do it), in tight jams, smack one's side mirrors with their metal bar handles (sorry you goddamned asshole!!), ride indiscriminately on lanes, flutter about without having to pay for tolls despite using the main part of the road. There is plenty of room at the side, especially just after the tarmac ends.

Unlike cars they can go the wrong way on a road, slip on to a pavement and travel about at night without lights. There is nowhere they cannot park and whenever they do it is highly important that they do so in a way that would take up as much space as possible. No red light can restrain them nor a small road divider detain them. They can ride up steps and through walk over bridges as easily as they can the grass and the smallest of alleys. Just like mosquitoes, Malaysian motorcyclists roam everywhere easily.

But unlike mosquitoes, you cannot smack them. You cannot even bump them a little with the tip of your car to nudge them off their bikes and if they were really nasty, run them over. In fact, don't you even dare honk at them. Even if they were in the wrong they would give you a nasty stare the look which spoke of a threat to your car, like a scratch. A long, deep and painful scratch. It's amazing how much a two second look can speak. Volumes.

And when they get themselves killed in spectacular fashion as a result of one of their stunts or negligence, we feel sorry for them. We feel sorry for them even though they practically laid out the red carpet for death to welcome his arrival. And how can we not when we see them lying by the side of the road often in a pool of shattered glass and blood, sometimes little chunks of their brains lying on the warm tarmac right next to them.

Then the government has all these social sort of advertisements regarding road saftey and making it like it is usually the four wheeled motorists fault. I mean, does everybody in the Ministry of Transport use a motorbike or do they travel by helicopters? I just don't get that. If at all, the police should be making extra sure all these road mosquitoes are caught and dealt with according to the law. Then four wheeled motorists (like me for instance) wouldn't be so thoroughly frustrated everyday and there wouldn't be as many accidents on the road. Because the qualifications and set up cost needed to get a bike is so ridiculously low. Because financing is so readily available. But also because sometimes these fellas sure know how to tempt you to run them over.

a speedster's view on speed...

I once said “if speed kills, why aren’t there any accident resulting in death in any F1 racing?”. I said that in a discussion group. Expectedly, I was treated like George Bush having lunch at Teheran square!

“You are missing the point!”, says a woman. “That is a controlled environment. Everyone is a professional. The cars are built for speed”, rationalised another person.

But that is precisely the point, isn’t it? Speed alone, doesn’t kill. In an environment where speed is encouraged, where rules and regulations are made and strictly complied with by everybody, where the speedsters are skilled at handling speed and where the machines are built to speed and suitably equipped to handle such speed, speed does not kill!

An F1 race, or any automobile race for that matter, is definite proof that speed does not kill. Need more proof? Well, look at the Autobahn. How many fatal accidents happen on the Autobahn? Thus, the emphasis on curbing speed as a solution to preventing accidents, fatal or otherwise, is an exercise which invites the usage of the proverbial “barking at the wrong tree”. I am a keen racer myself. And I had never been involved in any accident involving other drivers while practising, testing or taking part in racing events. There are times when I ended up in the gravel but those were caused solely by my own miscalculations, stupidity or my car’s mechanical failure. In fact, as a licensed racer, I feel much safer driving around the Sepang F1 track than on our public road! Just the other day I saw a motorcyclist lying dead along Jalan Duta (after the Parliament house) at peak hours on my way home after work. The road was jammed pack with cars and it was raining. How fast could he ride? But he was zig-zagging his way. Went on the emergency lane and hit a lorry which had earlier braked abruptly. What killed him? Speed?

Look at the happenings on our road. Motorcycles zig-zagging at every opportunity. Cars jumping ques, changing lanes at will and road hogging. Huge lorries driven in dangerous manners. Overloaded vans and lorries. Drunk drivers. Pedestrians oblivious to anything at all. Pot holes. Roads which change direction without proper signage/warning or at all. Policemen who are more interested in issuing summons rather than preventing offences. And drivers/road users with bad attitudes. Just to name but a few daily observation of what we see on our public roads.

Our police have all the data about all the accidents from all the police reports lodged. After all, it is mandatory under our law that every accident be reported to the police within 24 hours from its occurrence. Why don’t we engage a consultant to look at all these data? And come up with a statistic. This statistic would show, among others, the followings :-

- the type, model and age of vehicles involved in fatal accidents. This is important. How many time have we seen fatal accident involving expensive cars like BMW, Mercs, Lexus et al? Why are Kancils, Satrias, Kenaris, Sagas and old lorries, buses and vans and what have you always involved in fatal accidents? I am not a snob but this is a fact. Is it because something is wrong with these cars/vehicles or is it because there is something wrong with the owners of these cars/vehicles? If it was the later, the statistic would also show the profile of the owners of these vehicles.

- the profile of the drivers who are involved in fatal accidents.

- the circumstances under which fatal accidents take place. For example, what was the time? Was it dark? Was it raining? Was the traffic light working? Was there a traffic jam? Etc…

- the condition of the road where fatal accidents happen.

- the condition of the vehicles involved in fatal accidents. Was it old? Was it properly maintained? Was it overloaded? Etc..

- the nature of the location of the fatal accident.

These statistics will than have to be studied. The root cause or causes of accidents, fatal or otherwise could than be ascertained and addressed in a holistic manner. Issuing summons and going all out to collect the compounds and giving discounts on the compounds is not going to work. In fact, it is now proven that it is not working. Look at the data. Spend some money on this exercise. Spend some thoughts as well. And I am sure a holistic approach could be found to at least lessen the number of fatal accidents in this country.

In short, I say, please prepare a report…

Soma That Speed

Speed limits. Fascinating things. Let me get one thing clear first. I'm not discussing the speed limit imposed on those places where it is justified such as near schools and such, physically disabled people areas (such as where the Malaysian Association of the Blind is situated which is a centre of activity for many blind people), in long stretches of road in residential areas (used also as a tool to enforce peace and security), dangerous blind (not intended) corners and slip-in roads as most Malaysian cities have, and to regulate certain stretches of roads for to cater to their peculiar circumstances. No. Those places are wholly justified. In fact, I say the police should be watching those areas. It is there that they shall find the law trampled if not driven over regularly.

But not on the highways. Not those vast, flat and seductive empty six-laners that God laid down for those of us that want to place our pedal to the metal. No. Those places like the Garden of Eden should be left pristine just as it was made. A grave matte black with vertical disconnect white lines without those metal poles with the red circle and a number in the middle at the side. The following yellow triangle signs however are welcomed: falling rocks, high winds, winding roads up ahead, bumpy roads, and perhaps one for cops around the corner would be greatly appreciated. So as you can tell by now, I'm talking about speed limits on the highway.

The question I always find myself asking is this: if the highest one can travel in a vehicle in the country is 110 km/h, (1) why do car makers that make cars for our country not calibrate the car to limit its top speed to maybe 120 km/h only (only army and police excepted) (2) why doesn't the government make it a policy to limit the cars to that speed only and enforce it? Surely it would be easier to do that than to allow hundreds of thousands of vehicles every few years with the ability to go beyond the speed limit at will and try to contain them. The assumption is noble - people should be able to regulate themselves - but not most third world developing countries in Asia, including our country. In these places, laws are mere guides, even an opinion perhaps. But operationally it is an absolute disaster. Why do it this way then? I'm sure I am also not the only one to have thought about this and asked this question. I am certain the question must have occurred to all these traffic experts.

Will it kill people's need and desire for cars? No. You still get somewhere in them and that's the most useful part about them. The speed is secondary. So the car industry may take a dent but it certainly will not bring its doom. It may even save fuel, cars that don't go so fast or are not high performance also don't burn fuel as quickly too. And for the record, even the Toyota Prius goes up to almost 110 miles per hour (approximately 180 kilometers per hour). Will it make it easier to do policing? Yes. It would be so easy to see who is speeding beyond the limit. Less traffic police resources have to be invested into this area and it can be used for other purposes.

There are all these substantial benefits in favour of reducing speed this way but still it is not done. The question parallels the existential one. Why did God make us in and for freedom yet fashion such a narrow path for us to be near his Grace? A test of our faith, we could rationalize but it still sits rather uneasily sometimes. But back to the speed limit. And I suspect a reason governments allow cars to be so much higher above the speed limit is because they in some vague way understand that there is a freedom in being able to break the law and go as fast as you can in your car. You have the freedom to keep within or to break the law. That is important. Because that is one of the most fundamental rights we have as human beings. They day we are not able to do that we would have either a Brave New World or 1984, or worse both. Which if you think about, is the direction our country seems to be slowly drifting towards. Anybody got some soma?