I was driving this morning when I heard it over Mix FM. The blurb about Earth Wind and Fire coming to Malaysia for a show. Excuse me, Earth who? You mean, that groovy funky disco-ey group with afro hairdos and tight bell bottomed pants? That group which sang “Fantasy” and “Boogie Wonderland”? My God, but aren’t they too old to be prancing about the stage while shaking their butts to the…er…groove…whatever? Do people groove anymore nowadays? And what the hell is “funky”? Play that funky music, screams that guy, whatever his name was…erm…Wild Cherry? WTF is “funky”? Groove…what groove? The groove on the LPs? Jeez..what is an LP? Daddy, why are your CDs black in colour and they are so blinking big? And why do you need to put it on that platter and stick a needle on it before it makes some sound? And what sound are those? What are they saying? How do you behave to be “groovy”, “funky” or to “boogie”?
Why are all these people coming to Malaysia suddenly? When they are so friggin’ old they probably can’t carry a Strat without hyperventilating? Why weren’t these super duper groovy fellows coming here at the top of their popularity? Last year, it was the Boney M who came here. My God. Bonny friggin’who? Bonny M? They are so old they should probably change their name to Bonny Z by now! Who would want to see some old shyte prancing on the stage singing Daddy’s Cool? It ain’t blinking cool I tell ya!
One after another old, almost Jurassic, act comes to Malaysia nowadays. These acts would not even raise an eye lid if Malaysia was mentioned to them when they were on top of their career. Now suddenly they are saying that they have wanted to come here a long time ago but there wasn’t an opportunity to do so. And they had always had us, their Far Eastern fans, in their mind all these years. That is why they are coming after all these years. Ya, rite! The truth is nobody cares about them anymore in the US of A, Europe or Japan, or even Singapore for that matter. So, these old boys have to find a region where they might still have an audience. So, Malaysia it is and Malaysia it shall be. So, we have old wrinkled men and women coming to Malaysia to perform. South East Asia used to be a dumping ground for expired goods from the west. Now we have people who, really, are nearing expiration or should have expired a long time ago, coming to perform.
At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if Wild Cherry would make an appearance in KL soon…yeah…play that funky music white boy…jeeez….